Know Your Neighbors: Flame and Jason

Flame, left, and Jason, right, in Flame’s apartment.

Jason Fulgoni, 45, and Flame are two of over 670,000 workers* who lost their jobs last spring at the start of the pandemic. Flame, who uses they/them pronouns, had been working as a hairstylist and makeup artist, while their friend Jason, who uses he/him pronouns, was a mail clerk. In the months that followed, they became dedicated volunteers and leaders of various mutual aid projects in Western Queens. 

I got to sit down with Jason, Flame, and Flame’s many small, toothless dogs a few weeks ago to discuss how this happened. 

Flame: I was in Puerto Vallarta the last week of February to the first week of March [in 2020]. My mom started texting me that shit was hitting the fan. She’s like, Oh my God, I can’t find masks anywhere. Do you think you could find some in Mexico and bring some back? 

I didn’t know what was going on. All I knew was from my Facebook feed. I was sitting on the beach, reading the comments like, What? 

Jason: I’d been working at my old job for 15 years or so. In March, they told us to stay home. Now I’m a mail clerk, so if there’s no one in the building to help out, there’s no point. So they called [the mails clerks] up and said, I have to let you all go. 

Carly: How did the two of you become friends?

Flame: We met on Grindr. 

Jason: No! [laughs] We met through some mutual friends. 

Flame: Since we lived so close together, we started hanging out a lot.

Jason: During the time when the buses were free, we went around exploring Queens. We found a way of taking a bad thing and making it a good thing. I saw more of Queens than I had in my entire lifetime. 

Carly: How long have you lived in Jackson Heights?

Jason: I lived here all my life. This is my hometown. I’ve seen this community really change. It’s become more diverse. Communities have opened up when it comes to LGBT as well. It’s a different world these days. I really do love Jackson Heights. It’s gotten even better. 

Flame: I moved here in 2006. Just about half my life, I’ve been here. 

Carly: What do you get out of your friendship with each other?

Flame: He gets a lot of really good home-cooked meals. When he comes here, he gets some spices, some seasoning, some flavor. 

Jason: I think that what one person has, the other one doesn’t. Flame is more direct than I am.

Flame: Direct?!

Jason: I’m more shy. You’re more outspoken. I’m the sweet guy, and you’re - 

Flame: I’m the sweet bitch. 

Jason: [laughs] We find a common ground. We both like watching movies. We both love volunteering. 

Flame: Video games, exploring, trying different foods. 

Jason: We’ve become best friends because of that. 

Carly: How did you first get involved with Love Wins Food Pantry?

Flame: I heard about it on Facebook. I was like, This sounds amazing. Let’s go. Jason got there before me and got a spot on line. 

Jason: You have a better memory than I do.

Flame: Of course I remember! It was a monumental moment in my life. 

When we got to the front of the line, I saw these beautiful trans women of color, Latina women, giving out the food. My jaw dropped. I said, This is what I needed. This is what the neighborhood needs. We need representation. We need to be visible. I remember thanking them profusely. 

And then I saw Victor. He was taking people’s names and emails. I remember thinking to myself, Oh my God, he’s fucking hot. They got some beautiful trans women and some hunky man candy here. Love Wins Food Pantry is for me. 

They gave out hot plates of Peruvian food from across the street. Then we sat there and we ate chicken. I was sitting on the sidewalk eating my chicken and just watching. I fell in love with the food pantry. I showed up the next week, like, What can I do?

Carly: Why do you volunteer at Love Wins Food Pantry as opposed to other pantries? What sets it apart?

Flame: We are the only LGBT food pantry in all of New York. I heard that someone came all the way from Manhattan to Love Wins Food Pantry because he said that even in Manhattan, there weren’t any LGBT food pantries. It’s helping break down barriers between us and the rest of the community. Unfortunately, people might look down on us, might shun us. But we’re all in the same situation. We’re all helping each other out. 

Carly: I feel the same way. Can you tell me about your other mutual aid projects? 

Flame: We started Free Clothing Queens, which is an LGBT-run free clothing drive. It trickled down and spiraled off of Love Wins Food Pantry. 

We’re fundraising for a legit storage space because right now, the volunteers store the clothes in their own homes and it’s inconvenient. We have so many people that want to donate clothes, but we just don’t have the space for it. So that’s in the works. 

Jason: I was thinking, what could I do to help promote Free Clothing Queens? So I started fooling around with PowerPoint. I actually came up with our logo. Flame loved it so we started using it. Then I found out how to make flyers. I’m one of the media coordinators. I do the Facebook page.

Carly: So you’re learning skills for this?

Flame: He’s very excited about it. I see him learning and trying new things.

Jason: It’s bringing out my creativity. 

Flame: We had our first event in Travers Park because I’d been cutting hair there that summer. It started out as just a whimsical side project and it’s blown...the fuck...up. We did an interview with Estefania [a reporter for New York 1 Noticias], and it...blew...up. I didn’t think it would last this long, to be honest. 

Jason: We’ve come across a couple challenges with storage, and of course with Covid, and the weather. 

Flame: At the first event, they almost kicked us out of the park. [laughs]

Jason: I remember when the park police came. They turned a blind eye. They said it was admirable what we’re doing, but they suggested we do it at the schoolyard.

Flame: They gave us the idea. We’re not technically allowed to do it in a public space, but if we use a schoolyard when the school is not in session, they have no authority over that. Thanks to them, we started doing it at I.S.145. 

Carly: That’s my middle school.

Flame: Oh, is it?

Jason: I went to I.S.145 too! 

Flame: Did you ever think your middle school would turn into an LGBT clothing drive on the weekends?

Carly: No! [laughs] Definitely not. But I’m glad. 

With love always, Carly

*Source: The New York Times